CAROLYN'S COMPOSITIONS

January 29, 2009

CHILD ABUSE CREATES VICTIMIZATION


CAROLYN’S COMPOSITIONS

CHILD ABUSE CREATES VICTIMIZATION

This post is part of a continuing series about child abuse and parenting. At the end of this article are links to the other posts in this series and on this subject. If the links do not work, go to www.carolyncholland.wordpress.com , click on the folder CHILD ABUSE, and scroll down the posts to find answers to your questions.

     Abuse, the wrongfully use of a person, can affect the core of their being to the extent that it influences every aspect of their life, from the moment of the first act of mistreatment. Abuse of this depth is considered “trauma.”
     What is considered “trauma” can vary with each individual. Much depends on the individual’s past experience, personality make-up, perception and responses of others to the trauma.
     A VICTIM is a person who experiences a trauma. Many victims of trauma heal and continue on with life, with minimal long-term effects.
     The danger occurs when the victim is VICTIMIZED. Victimization occurs when the victim ACCEPTS THE BLAME FOR THE PERPETRATOR’S ACTIONS. Child abuse, in particular, lends itself to victimization.
     A basic effect of trauma is BETRAYAL.    
     To a child, their parents (or primary caretakers) are perceived as “gods,” since the child is totally dependent on them for their basic needs and survival.
     Often, deep down, the child KNOWS he is not the cause of the trauma. However, due to his dependency, he MUST believe that his parents are not to blame. After all, “gods” are always right. If it weren’t so, how could the child depend on them for his survival?
     Thus, the child accepts the blame for the abuse, and victimization occurs.
~~~~~~
     There are ways to avoid or minimizing trauma to your child.
     First, know your child. What is traumatizing to one child may be corrective to another.
     Second, edify your child, eg. build him/her up in an authentic manner.
     Third, seek counsel. If you have only had examples of punishment and not of discipline in your own life, reeducate yourself.
     Fourth, control your own reaction to your child’s trauma. Your reaction can be further traumatizing.
     Finally, love your child’s other parent. That is the best gift you can give your child.
~~~~~~
PARENT-CHILD ACTIVITY
Learn about your child through a picture collage. Find pictures in old magazines representing the child’s likes and dislikes. Paste them on separate poster board or cardboard. This allows your child to express who he is.

ADDITIONAL READING:

CHILD ABUSE SERIES:

CHILD ABUSE DEFINITIONS

TYPES OF ABUSE

CHILD ABUSE AND SCRIPTURE

ARTICLES ON ABUSE:

WILL YOU LOVE ME TO DEATH?

SHOULD INFORMATION ON AN ALLEGED CHILD ABUSER BE PUBLICIZED?

WILL YOU LOVE ME TO DEATH?

BUTLER STREET

BEYOND THE ROCK

THOUGHTS FOR DAVID

REACH OUT

A PIECE OF ME

THE WELL-ADJUSTED CHILD

CHILD ABUSE AND SCRIPTURE

CHILDREN LEFT HOME ALONE (or in cars alone)

ANOTHER HORRIFYING HEADLINE

DOES EXAGGERATING THE TRUTH CREATE GOOD STORIES?

KILLED STRANGELY: A NEW ENGLAND MURDER STORY

THE HOLOCAUST STORY OF A TEENAGE VICTIM (Part 1)

MY HAPPY PLACE

Leave a Comment »

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

What is your opinion?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: