“Do you have your Christian language yet?” Jill asked, leaning across the pew toward Alice and me.
“No,” I responded.
“Do you want it?” Her eyes gazed intently into mine.
“Not really. Not at this time.”
“You need it,” she insisted.
“There are other issues to be considered.”
“Regardless of he other issues, you cannot let anything interfere with your receiving your gift.”
Jill is a committed Christian and active church member. As her house guests for the weekend, Alice and I had felt obligated to accompany her to her charismatic church. The service had gone well.
At the end of the pastor’s message there was a prayer time, during which I watched and listened as various members spoke in tongues. There was one couple where each took a turn screeching their “language.” I cannot recall the pastor’s brief comment about the couple, but I was left with the impression their “screeching” had to do with releasing demons.
After a period of group prayer, the pastor invited persons to come forward for individual prayer. That was what had brought on Jill’s questioning me regarding my finding my Christian language.
I was getting somewhat annoyed at Jill’s persistence, and finally said: “I’m where God wants me to be.”
“OK.” There was a tone of resignation in Jill’s voice, but by now she had gained Alice’s attention. With renewed vigor she proceeded to instruct us on the value of the gift of tongues as a tool to embrace prayer, to reach out to non-Christians and to enhance our other God-given gifts. She explained that without the “Christian language” doing God’s work was like digging a garden with a spoon rather than a shovel.
At Jill’s urging, Alice accepted the pastor’s invitation to go to the front of the church for prayer. I remained in my seat and observed the proceedings.
I watched as a woman anointed Alice’s feet with oil and prayed over her. I heard the pastor tell her she had a book within her. Meanwhile, another woman fell back on the floor, apparently anointed with the Holy Spirit.
After the service, when Alice and I were together in my car and on the way home, she asked me if I’d felt uncomfortable with Jill’s invitation.
“Yes,” I responded. “But I can’t explain it.
Alice told me that she, too, was uncomfortable in the situation, but she felt an obligation, as Jill’s guest, to accept the invitation. Alice thought that Jill wanted her prayers.
I’m often an observer in a situation who processes information received at a later time, so it wasn’t until the next day, while pulling dandelions in my front yard, that I pondered the situation. The result was the gaining of a better perspective and understanding as to why Jill’s evangelistic approach had made me uncomfortable.
I’ve been a committed Christian for years. I understand what God’s gifts are, and know what my God-given gifts are. Yet Jill treated me as a “newbie” (to adapt computer terminology). She didn’t begin a discussion of gifts, nor did she ask me if I knew my gifts. She proceeded to “lecture” me on the need to have the gift of tongues.
By not giving me credit for being a Christian, a maturing Christian, she diminished me.
I also realized Jill wanted to make the decision where I stand with God. This is not her place. It’s God’s responsibility.
Implicit in her desire to make certain I have the “gift” was a statement that I was an inferior Christian. Yet the gift of tongues is not an essential gift. It is, in fact, the least of the gifts. If God wants me to have this gift, I trust him to direct me to him. Meanwhile, I open and use his other gifts, rejoicing in the fruit they produce.
In all Jill’s conversations a question arises whether the person we’re discussing is Christian. She states this is the only route to a moral and Godly life.
Evidence doesn’t support this. I’ve met many persons who are not Christian who live a more “Godly,” moral life than many Christians I know.
Jill elicits a feeling that if she can bring a person to Christ, or is able to take her guests up front (and especially if they have an “experience”), she will add another star to her crown. This makes me feel like I, as well as others she encounters, are objectified, seen mainly as people to be converted to her beliefs and not respected for where they actually are in their Godly walk.
God created mankind to develop through a process, not to reach the end of the road before walking the journey or by competing for God’s favor and blessing.
I’ve introduced the Scripture to many an adult victim of childhood abuse. Had I hit them with “being saved,” being “overcome by the Holy Spirit” or “speaking in tongues” without taking time to listen to their stories and providing backing teachings, they would have fled. My initiation for them is their creation in the image of God and their being a vessel of the Holy Spirit. God and the vessel of the Holy Spirit are valuable, not to be punched, thrown against a wall or verbally demoralized.
Considering all the explanations, the underlying issue is that Jill didn’t treat me like a human being worthy of respect. She felt it was her place to determine where I should be in my relationship to God. She didn’t recognize that that decision is one between God and myself.
Later Alice told me it was sweet of Jill to want to share with us what made her so happy. I would agree—had Jill stopped with the invitation and accepted my decision. She didn’t—she initiated a lecture—and that is why I felt discomfort.
I was now able to respond to Alice’s question about why I felt uncomfortable in the situation.
I’d like to hear how you would respond to a similar situation. How would you have felt? What are your views on evangelization? (Respond with your comments in the box below!)
For additional reading click on:
Hi! I am also a Christian who loves Jesus and is without the “Christian language” as it was put… I have been told that Im not baptised by fire yet…i don’t have the Holy Ghost yet…
My mother (who was not fit to raise me, as she was busy with boyfriends and her topless dancing career) has always had the gifts of tongues. I live my life on The Word of the Living God, I believe it to be Holy Spirit Inspired, infallible and I believe it from cover to cover.
I do believe in the gift of speaking in tongues although I haven’t been given it. I also believe in being discerning as I have experienced MANY false Christians with no fruit in their life, no fear or obedience to Gods word, speaking in tongues.
The Bible does state that these gifts are the least, yet those with the gift seem to continue to propel it to the top of the totem pole stating that those who dont have said gift are lacking the Holy Spirit. Hhhmmm… sounds like an idea/accusation from satan himself.
I know the Lord and follow him with all my heart, I will do anything to please him. People that know me would say this of me wholeheartedly.
I am just concerned that her and several others( not all) that I have experienced with this gift, are deceived, and trying to deceive others as well. I took this to God years ago when I was being told this by her and a Christian guy from church with the gift that was also trying to sleep with me, and God took me to 1Corinthians where it states that its the least of the gifts. Praise the Lord for freeing me of that bondage!
Furthermore, some people are not representing our Lord when they do this, and that is so freaky to me. I think we need to address those as well…but how?
Comment by Christe Mihok — March 3, 2009 @ 5:08 pm |
As a non-gifted speaking tongues christian myself, I was drawn to your blog since I am about to join a church that whole heartedly believes in the gift of tongues.
I hope as I grow in Christ there that they don’t push it on me and I want to equip myself if they begin too.
I must say, as I read your story although you have a point that she was not sensitive to your position and her approach was a bit off…since we…both you and I have not experienced The Gift…we really shouldn’t say how someone should or could react in response to it. Do you remember when you got saved?? I know I wanted to shout from the mountain tops and wondered why everyone did not know Christ. I was a little pushy and aggressive myself when I invited friends and family to Church because I wanted so much for them to experience what I had.
Imagine experiening the gift of tongues. Its I am sure a Super Natural experience that is difficult to put in words…hence tongues Haha. just kidding.
uh..but now really..I was not there so you must take heed to my message for I have no favor for either one of you.
It really sounded like she wanted you to have the experience that she had and she really wanted to share it with someone like you. So I would be very flattered.
Thank you for this because I realized that I must be gentle and how I am going to be open to react to any pushy people in the Church…with real Christ like patience..and Godly wisdom to edify.
xoxo
iDalis De Leon
Los Angeles
Comment by idalis — March 22, 2009 @ 9:25 am |
iDalis, Thank you for your thoughtful comment.
My only response is that the person I was experiencing was not a new Christian, nor was she new to speaking in tongues, shouting her experience from the hilltop. She was a mature Christian who should have known somewhat better, and she knew I was also a mature Christian.
I wish you the best, and hope you remain sensitive to others, both those who might push you into a gift you might not be ready for, and, if and when you get the gift, to those who do not have the same gift.
Carolyn C. Holland
Comment by carolyncholland — March 22, 2009 @ 10:11 am |
Its been some time since this blog originated and Ive had some time to reflect on this more…
If a person actually does speak in tongues and its not an act, how is it edifying to anyone else to hear since they are the only one that claim to understand the meaning?
Personally, Ive changed my view on this. I do not believe that “tongues” are even for today. The only people I have ever met that say/demonstrate speaking in tongues are complete weirdos and doing very little if anything to further the Faith. In fact, if I meet someone who claims to do this, I will more than likely run in the other direction.
I definitely would not attend a Church that had people disrupting the message with all their babbling.
Dont you find it suspicious that there are certain churches that the “gift” abounds in? Coincidence? I think not. I submit to you that they are nothing more than cults and trying to convince one another that they are actually doing something Godly.
This is one reason why many unbelievers want nothing to do with our faith, theyre afraid of the guys in the ‘white jackets’ coming to get them.. and rightfully so.
The most powerful, influential Christians I have ever met were also the least spooky. You will know them by their fruit.
Comment by Christe Mihok — March 3, 2011 @ 12:37 pm |